A confused lab

HELLO FOLKS.
FIRST, I’D LIKE TO THANK ALL OF THOSE WHO HAVE COMMENTED SO FAR ON THIS LITTLE SPACE I HAVE ON THE NET. GLAD TO KNOW YOU ALL READ AND ENJOY. KEEP THE COMMENTS COMING.
NOW TO TELL YOU YET ANOTHER TALE OF THE COMPLETE NON SENSICAL ACTS OF THE HUMAN RACE. I JUST WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND THEM. MY MOM TOOK ME TO A FESTIVAL YESTERDAY. NOW, I DON’T KNOW WHY HUMANS GO WHERE THEY GO, NOR DO I KNOW WHY THEY DO WHAT THEY DO, BUT I SUSPECT IT’S JUST TO TORTURE US DOGS. THINK ABOUT IT. THIS FESTIVAL FOR INSTANCE. THEY ARRIVED, I BEGAN GUIDING MY MOM THROUGH CROUDS, BOOTHS, PEOPLE DRESSED UP WEIRD, AND KIDS POPPING OUT EVERYWHERE WANTING TO PET AND SCREAMING DOGGY DOGGY! ALL FOR, FOOD! THEY GOT PLATES OF FOOD AND WENT TO EAT WHILE WATCHING THE MADNESS. COULDN’T WE DO THAT AT HOME WHERE I CAN HAPPILY CHEW MY BONE AND NOT WORRY ABOUT WHO’S GUNNA SLAM IN TO MY POOR MOM? ANYWAYS. THAT WAS THEIR MAIN PURPOSE I SUPPOSE BECAUSE IT WAS THE FIRST THING THEY DID. SO AFTERWARDS, WE WALKED AROUND SOME MORE, I GOT FRUSTRATED BECAUSE THERE WAS THIS CROUD OF GOCKING PEOPLE WHO WOULD NOT MOVE OUT OF MY WAY. YOU HAVE FEET PEOPLE USE THEM! IT’S LIKE THEY’VE NEVER SEEN A DOG BEFORE. MOM GAVE ME LOTS OF ENCOURAGEMENT AND PRAISE WHICH I GREATLY LIKED AS CROUDS TEND TO STRESS ME OUT AS YOU CAN SEE. IT WASN’T TO BAD THOUGH. WE SAW A LITTLE DOG AT THE FESTIVAL AND HE WAS JUST YELLING AT WINSTON AND ME. I GAVE HIM MY MOST WITHERING LOOK LIKE YOU ARE NOT WORTH MY TIME AND HE MOVED ON. THEN WE SAW HIM AGAIN LATER AND HE WAS YELLING AT US AGAIN. DIDN’T LEARN HIS LESSON. THIS TIME I IGNORED HIM COMPLETELY. MOM PRAISED ME BIG TIME FOR THAT. SHE GETS REALLY CRAZY HAPPY WHEN I LEAVE OTHER DOGS ALONE. I’D LEAVE MORE ALONE IF THEY’D STAY OUT OF MY BUSINESS I MEAN IT. THEY MAKE FUN OF MY HARNESS. I AIN’T PUTTIN’ UP WITH OTHER DOGS MAKIN’ FUN OF ME! I HAVE AN IMPORTANT JOB TO DO AND I TAKE IT SERIOUSLY. SO WE FINALLY LEFT THE FESTIVAL TO MY GREAT RELIEF, AND MOM TOOK ME TO PETSMART. WELL I WAS HAVIN’ THE TIME OF MY LIFE, BUT MOM WAS NOT HAPPY WITH ME. SHE KEPT CORRECTING ME AND STUFF. I’M LIKE CHILL WOMAN I JUST WORKED MY BUTT OFF FOR YOU! LET ME BE A DOG IN HERE. GUESS I WAS TAKING IT A BIT FAR OR SOMETHIN’. I WAS JUST SNIFFIN’, AND TELLIN’ DOGS OFF FOR BEIN’ IN MY WAY. MOM PULLED ME ASIDE AND STARTED MAKING ME SIT AND LIE DOWN, THEN SIT AND LIE DOWN AGAIN AND AGAIN! SO EMBARRASSING! DOGS WERE LAUGHING AT ME, PEOPLE WERE WATCHING LIKE WHY DOES THAT GIRL KEEP MAKING HER DOG SIT THEN LIE DOWN, THEN SIT AGAIN AND STUFF. I SULKED FOR A WHILE AFTER THAT TILL I SAW WINSTON TALKING TO A YELLOW LAB. I GOT ALL MAD AND CHEWED THE OTHER DOG OUT. HE WAS A YOUNG MOUTHY PUNK. AND I GOT IN TROUBLE FOR THAT TOO. MOM REALLY NEEDS TO LEARN DOGGY LANGUAGE. IF SHE HEARD WHAT THAT DOG WAS SAYIN’ I WOULDN’T HAVE GOT BUSTED I MEAN IT. O WELL. WE WENT TO YET ANOTHER PLACE FOR HUMANS TO EAT. SOMETHING THEY DO FAR TO MUCH I’M CONVINCED. I WAS A GOOD GIRL THERE. AND FINALLY WE WENT HOME. I FOUND MY FAVORITE BONE AND CHEWED IT THEN TOOK A LONG NAP. IT WAS A HARD DAY FOR ME, BUT MOM HUGGED ME A LOT AND TOLD ME I WAS A GOOD GIRL AND THAT SHE LOVED ME. THAT’S ALL THAT MATTERS AT THE END OF MY DAYS, DOES MOM STILL LOVE ME. AND IF ANY OF YOU OUT THERE LET ON THAT I’VE GONE SOFT IN THIS AREA, I’LL SLAP THE LOT OF YOU I MEAN IT. MOM CLEANED OUT MY CRATE AND MADE MY BED SMELL ALL NICE AND GOOD. I’M GUNNA HEAD OFF TO SLEEP IN IT NOW. Y’ALL BEHAVE YOURSELVES.

REBA THE DOG.