What happened?

Hey everyone, forgive this post if it's a bit incoherent. I've been through an interesting ordeal, and I'm still tryin' to put it together. So this mornin', dad comes in and wakes my mom up and says some stuff to her. Well, she gets up, and takes me out to park. Now it's still kind of dark outside. So I'm like what on earth! But I went, and came back in all ready for my food with yogurt on it! Come on mom, hand it over! Nope, mom hands my leash to dad, and he takes me out the door. What? Where we goin' dad? Mom ain't even dressed! And she hugged me and told me she loved me and to be a good girl. Where'm I goin'? Well, in a few minutes I found out. Dad was takin' me to the vet. Ok, not a problem, I seem to live at vets a lot. Well, then he hands my leash to a stranger and leaves! Now I'm freekin'. My mom! Where's my mom! She don't know I'm with strangers I bet. These people took me back and put me in a crate. Like I'm some pup from the pound. Excuse me, I'm a service dog hello! They ain't listenin' to me. There ain't even any treats in this place. After a while, another person came to get me and I went with them in to a room. There they exammoned my teeth. Yes that tooth is cracked don't you dare touch it! Well this is where it gets fuzzy cuz they gave me a shot, and next thing I knew, I was back in the crate, sort of heavy feelin' and there were strange noises around me. Still no food I thought sleepily, and my tooth feels funny. I slept off and on then for I don't know how long. I dreamed of food, and my mom, and wondered what on earth had been done to me. Well finally, after watching other dogs come and go in other crates and wonderin' if I'd ever get to get out, someone came for me. They took me to a room, and there was my April and Winston, and O mom! Mom was there to save me! I jumped almost up in her lap! She was so happy to see me and me too. I was like get me home, feed me, get me outa here I mean it! So we got home and I had to pee like no one's business. Afterwards, I walked inside and sniffed hopefully at my food dish. Mom, in case you haven't noticed, you didn't feed me yet today. She didn't listen to me. She tried to get me to lie down and relax and rest, but I'm like no mom! I want food! I been lyin' all day! Finally, she feeds me and o man did I eat. She gave me wet food which is a delectible creation let me tell you. Shoot I thought I died and went to heaven. So after my belly was finally full, mom put me on tie down and I slept. It was relaxing finally being in my own bed. I woke up later and felt all warm and tired still. I still am not sure what all happened, accept my tooth is fixed, and the rest of my teeth feel cleaner. That's cool. Shoot did ya have to nock me out to do that. My word! Hope everyone out there is doin' well, o and mom says I should welcome my new readers since I haven't in a while and I have new ones. So welcome, thanks for listenin' and there I did my humanly duty of bein' nice. I'm off to continue being a butthead.

 

Reba the dog.

 

Happy Newyear

Ok so that title, mom put that in for free. I don't even know what Happy Newyear means. Seemes like yet another excuse for the humans to eat and stay up late yellin' while I'm tryin' to sleep. The cool thing though, Dasher mom gave us apples. Man she cool! Apples, carrots, cheese, this place is sweet! Ok so now on to what I really wanted to post about. So as you all know, for the past several weeks, I've been tryin' my absolute hardest to get on beds. I'm old, I'm bony cuz mom starves me, keep workin' on her Dasher mom. She'll cave keep goin'. Anyways, I believe I've figured out a way to get myself on the bed. It's taking some time, but it's gunna be worth it let me tell ya.

So my April, she's the smart human. She closes her door now when she's not around so I can't get on her bed. So my first task is to get her to leave that door open again. A few times I have been shut in there on accident, and instead of getting on the bed like I used too, I stay off. I lay by the door or somethin'. Well then my mom and my April come in and check the bed for a warm spot. Then I get praised up big time for not gettin' on the bed. See where I'm goin' now? You gotta build up the trust of the humans, eventually they will crack and say, you know, I think Reba's got it, we can leave the doors open, she won't get on the beds anymore. Score! I'll be on that bed snuggled in the pillows before you can even blink! Life is about patience I've learned, good things come to those who wait.

So not much else to report all, I actually got to do some work the other day in the mall. That was fun and I was a good leaderdog. We went to a place for the humans to eat too and I layed on the floor like a good girl, only reaching once to sniff hopefully at somethin' on the floor. Crack! Ah! Mom what in the world! Anyway! We went in the pet store and that stupid mom of mine made me work through the store. Shoot I was mad. She doesn't do that much! And she put on my gentle leader again too half way through all cuz I just wanted to say hi to the cats. Excuse me! Whatever. Well I better go before I really get riled up. I'm goin' to play in the snow again with the boys. Y'all be good.

 

Reba the dog.

 

 

 

Humans are so embarrassing

Hey all,

So my mom and I are still home here in Ohio. This is cool! We ain't stayed this long since I don't even remember. Yesterday, my Dasher mom was sick so we had to be quiet. Well Winston the big ofe don't even know what quiet means. He all grabbin' me and snortin' and sneezin' and stuff, I'm just tryin' to defend myself. Well, after several attempts by my mom and my April to shut him up to no avail, they decided to take us for a walk to release our energy. Well that was exciting till mom busted out my gentle leader. Shoot! I hate that thing! So embarrasing! So mom puts it on my face, and hooks a really really short leash to it so I can't pull at all. I'm like o please don't let me see anyone I know. Didn't even give me a chance to see if I'd behave right. Shoot I thought this was gunna be a fun rompin' walk with mom. If you don't want me releasin' my energy, mide as well put on my harness and we'll just work down the street. Humans these days. So, I'd of been fine if we didn't see anyone. O no, we weren't walkin' five minutes before two little rodants who call themselves dogs came tearing out at us. One barkin' like mad, the other tryin' to get a piece of me or somethin'. He wasn't barkin' or growlin', just all in my face. So we got away from them, and kept walkin'. Then we saw two other dogs, these were bigger. What is this dog off leash day? I want off this leash I mean it! I cried to let mom know this too. She ignored me as always. Whatever. So we headed home next, it was super windy out and it was trash day, so trash cans were blowin' everywhere and I had to keep takin' mom around them. That was free mom. I ain't even workin' here. I better get an extra cup of food or somethin'. Nope, no such luck. I'm so under appreciated. Mom gives me hugs and stuff, but what I want is food! A whole bag of it! I'll just keep tryin'. Hope you all are doin' well. Until next time.

 

Reba the dog.

 

Merry Christmas

Well hello again all, This is a day late, but o well. I just wanna say Merry Christmas to all my faithful readers. Not really sure what Christmas is, but it means give presents to Reba day. Well, my Dasher and my Winston got presents too, so it must be give all dogs presents day. I got two new bones, and a cool toy like Matilda's. It looks like an egg. And mom stuffed it with food and o boy was that fun. I got carots too. I been eatin' carots a lot since I been home. Not much else happened today. My mom and my April opened new things, and they all ate a huge meal cuz again, that's what humans do. My Dasher got a new bed, I got to lay in his old one while the humans all watched a loud movie. I slept through most of it. So this is just to say Merry Christmas once again, hope Santa paws treated all you dogs well, and I didn't get that monkey. O well. I'm still waitin'. Y'all be good now.

 

Reba the dog.

 

Bad day, and how to make your human look stupid

Hey again folks.
So in all the excitement of the changes in my life I forgot to tell you all about my bad day. I got yelled at so much! First my April literally lifted me in the air for gettin' in the trash. Excuse me for sniffin'! There was no need for her to do that. And then my Karen', good grief from the time I got in the room it was, "Reba sit! Reba come! Reba lay down! Reba stay! Reba nanananana!" Goodness! I was so offended at the bunch of them all day. Absolutely uncalled for behavior. Leave me alone I mean it!
Now for my second part. How to make your human look dumb.
Ok so me and my mom are in a store with dad right, and I decided to totally make mom look dumb cuz it's funny and she can't do nothin' about it. So dad goes to leave the store, I'm followin' him just like I should, when at the last second, before goin' out, I turn sharply. Well mom thinks Dad's going that way so she just follows me, trustin' that I'm still followin' dad. So I'm trottin' along, down some random isle, and the key here is to pull just hard enough so your human thinks you know what you're doin' and where you're goin'. Works every time, dad finally calls my mom and she turns around all confused. It was great. I'm laughin' myself silly even now thinkin' about it. Bless the humans. Allright all, I'll post a christmas message soon. It'll be after Christmas, but o well y'all can just deal. Laters.

 

Reba the dog.

How to subtly snatch things from the floor.

Sup everybody.
I haven't written in a while. I been a busy lab. Actually, mom's been more busy so she hasn't been able to post as often for me. First, a bit of catchin' up.

Since I last wrote, things in my life haven't changed too much. I'm still confused as to why we ain't goin' to work anymore, but I'm startin' to get used to

that. Mom was real sick for a few days. So much so that I wouldn't even go near her. Normally I stay close by when she's sick, but man this time, she

was just burnin' up, and shakin', I never seen her shake so much. So anyway, she got better and we packed up and headed back to Ohio. I think we

gunna be here for a while too cuz mom packed up the birds and fish that I share my life with too. It was an interesting trip home with Winston and me,

mom and my April, My Dasher mom, those two birds, and I think the fish were there somewhere, though I never saw where they was.
Now for the main part of my message. How to get somethin' you want off the floor. I was at a restaurant with my mom last week, and it was one of those

restaurants where there are peanuts on the floor. And we ain't supposed to eat them? Shoot they on the floor! Clean up stupid humans! Anyways, I ain't

sposed to have peanuts, but I don't even care. So we sit at our table, and right away I see a peanut on the floor, not far from me. Well, you'd think I'd just

lunge and grab it right? Nope, here's how to do it without gettin' in trouble. The key is, patience. Keep an eye on your human. They're gunna be paying

attention to you a lot when you first sit down cuz they know you like to sniff the floor. So, wait. Make them think you're sound asleep. I waited till the

food came. And while my mom was fillin' her face, I started inchin'. Slowly, slowly, finally I lunged at the last second, and though mom did reach down, I

was already crunchin'. That's another thing. Don't sit there rejoicing with your victory at snatchin' the prize, That's when humans can swoop in with the

dreaded drop it command. And hopefully you don't have a human like my April. She'll reach in and chase that prize. I got it leave me alone! So crunch it

up fast. You may get corrected, but you got the prize so it's all worth it.
Well, it's all snowy here and all I wanna do is be outside. So I may not post in a while again because I'm havin' to much fun in the white stuff. I been

workin' in some stores with mom and doin' a fabulous job too.
O and I got a cracked tooth. I can't chew on one side of my mouth. Mom's tryin' to take care of it for me, but man it's annoying. I think I be all caught up

now. If I don't write before, I hope all my readers out there have a merry Christmas. I better get a monkey I mean it. I told Santa paws I wanted a

Monkey and food for christmas. I better get at least one of those if not both. I been a good labby too I mean it! Ok sure I been a bit hyper, but I'm

excited! There's snow outside who can't be excited! Y'all be good now, actually don't cuz I also told Santa paws that if people were bad to just give me

their presents. Till later everybody.

Reba the dog.

Update and other things

Hey my homys
First I'd like to thank those of you who have commented on my posts. Makes me glad when I get comments. Means there's readers out there.
Well I'm back home again with my mom. But boy things sure are different. Mom must still be on vacation or somethin' cuz we ain't been to work since we

got home. In fact, mom went in today and took all her stuff home. I'm so confused. The cool part is, I been over on campus a lot more. I love it over

there. I get to play with my Winston, and see my April, and beg for food off my mom's friends. Never works cuz humans are dumb, but least I try. Now

I'm also beggin' to get on beds. My Rachel bed, my Karen bed, My april bed, none of them will let me up! What in the world! I'm old I can't be layin' on

the floor I mean it. I'm so offended. Well, other than wonderin' what on earth is goin' on with my mom, I been doin' a lot of sleepin'. Mom's been cleaning,

and doing things around the house during the day while I'm in my crate just because I can. And then in the evenings, we get to go hang with the gang.

Matilda so dumb. At dinner tonight, My rachel accidentally dropped her bowl of salad on the fool lab's head. But what does she do? She just layed in it

like she had good sense. There go Matilda layin' in the carot patch. Winston's all concerned about her head and if she be ok, I'm screamin' at him to grab

a carot and toss it my way. I can have carots I mean it! Shoot she ain't even a dog I mean it! Mitilda, this one's for you. You give labs a bad name. Lain'

in a pile of food and not eatin' it or sharin' even. Goodness. This is the time for a famous labby moan. I'm signin' off for now.

Reba the dog.